The Big List of Twanzphobes – definitive

Ellen

Last night’s Oscars, could they have beeeeen any more twanzphobic?

No! So obviously, every twanzphobe everywhere must be called out for their twanzphobia. And probably DIAF whilst they are at it. Because: twanzphobia. That is reasons.

In the Oscar’s opening monologue, Ellen DeGeneres said a bad bad word:

“Hello to the best Liza Minnelli impersonator I’ve ever seen,” DeGeneres joked about the icon who, writes HuffPost, has been a favorite subject for female impersonators and drag artists over the years. “Good job, sir.”

That’s right, how dare Ellen mistake an actual female for being a male tranzwoman!!! Doesn’t Ellen know that twanzwomen, and their part time colleagues, drag queens, should be male, and only male, and are the mostest oppressedest laydees on the planet??

To rub salt into the wound, Minnelli, just before the screen cut back to Ellen, showed her disgust at the joke at her expense. Doesn’t Minnelli know that being mistaken for a female impersonator is the highest of honours, that she would almost rid herself of that horrid cis-privilege, albeit for a microsecond. How fucking twanzphobic of Minnelli not to be honoured by such a mistake! Damn these multiple layers upon layers of twanzphobia!

Liza

Then this film, of all films, just so fucking twanzphobic:

86th Annual Academy Awards - Show

Jared Leto scored his first Oscar on Sunday night, taking home Best Supporting Actor for his role in “Dallas Buyers Club” as Rayon, an HIV-positive transgender woman living in Texas in the 1980s. Many in the transgender community are questioning why a straight, white male actor had the role in the first place, while others are taking issue with the fact that he did not thank the transgender community in his acceptance speech.

Here is what the fucking twanzphobe had the nerve to say when he was (ever so rightly!!) harrassed at another award ceremony:

During a Q&A at the Santa Barbara Film Festival in February, Leto was heckled and accused of “trans-misogyny” for portraying the transgender Rayon, the Guardian noted. While the heckler took issue with the fact that a trans actor was not cast for the role, the 42-year-old actor said that ideology would then prevent members of the gay community from portraying straight characters.

Like c’mon, there would be hundreds of Genuine Twanzwomen™ who would jump at this role, Horseface Arquette for one! But wait… this scene is twanzphobic:

Leto-drag

Yes, it shows someone putting on their laydeeface. Real Genuine Twanzwomen™ would not be seen dead without their laydeeface! The scriptwriters are twanzphobic. The script is twanzphobic. The director is twanzphobic. Hell, even the cameradude who shot the scene is twanzphobic. The jury is out on the sounddude, but hey, if he ain’t a Genuine Twanzwoman™, then yep, twanzphobic for sure. Certainly anyone (not a Genuine Twanzwoman™) who watched the scene in the film, is yep, twanzphobic.

Not just the Oscars either, twanzphobia is all over the media! Piers Morgan, fucking twanzphobe. Katie Couric, fucking twanzphobe with cis-privilege. And this dude, for saying this twanzphobic shit:

By my logic, you could say that anyone dressing up in any kind of costume or notable outfit is putting on drag.

zmog, could he *be* any more twanzphobic? Nope, he should rightly DIAF.

So in review, the twanzphobes are:

  • lesbians, them and their fucking cis-privilege, they obviously have no fucking idea about oppression
  • straight women, they have cis-privilege, and by merely existing, are killing off millions of Genuine Twanzwomen™ AS WE SPEAK
  • 3rd wavers and twanz-supporting libfems, way too much cis-privilege, and spend way too much (ie any) time, talking about female things, just don’t do that you twanzphobes, womanyparts and womanythings are twanzphobic (but ok when a twanzwoman imitates them), and you should be focusing 100% of your time on Genuine Twanzwomen™ and how they are way more oppresseded than anything eva – anything less is of course, twanzphobic
  • radical feminists – that goes without saying, them and their TERFtastic ways
  • straight men, who have the audacity to dress in drag when not Genuine Twanzwomen™, because Genuine Twanzwomen™ are of course mainly straight males who feel like women inside
  • gay men, how the fuck dare you try to take back the core LGB from the T, by blowing the lid on the whole drag thing
  • twanssexuals, coz they ain’t twanzjendahs (and they are mainly gay)
  • drag queens, same as above
  • anyone in the lgbT, who is not a T, because dammit, the movement is not about sexual orientation, it’s about clothing! As well as all you other letters being twanzphobic for not being T
  • twanzmenz, coz you now have male privilege, and Genuine Twanzwomen™ never ever ever had any male privilege, ever
  • the 1980s and earlier, and films about the 1980s and earlier, because twanzwomen had not been invented yet and they were called drag queens and transsexuals
  • all animals, because there aren’t any twanzwomen animals, Genuine or otherwise

I must say, as exhaustive as that list is, it may have missed some key twanzphobes. So I have designed a Foolproof™ method of accounting for every single twanzphobe on the planet.

The revised Big List of Twanzphobes is:

  • Anyone who is not a Genuine Twanzwoman™

Yep, that covers all of those nasty twanzphobes. Even twanzbillionaire twanzsquirrels named Dave.

24 thoughts on “The Big List of Twanzphobes – definitive

  1. Hecuba

    Just what I was thinking – according to the men in frocks brigade- anyone who isn’t a male in a frock is twanzphobic! Bingo – men in frocks are the most oppressed victims on this planet!

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    1. DaveSquirrel Post author

      On a slightly more serious note (gasp!)
      The whole fucking tranz circus is so ridiculous – so why does it actually need to be treated so seriously?

      Transjactivists have appropriated all rights movements, including feminism and civil rights – why do we even need to pretend to be polite any more, when they make a mockery out of actual oppression?

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    1. DaveSquirrel Post author

      LOL ‘pixiedust69′, you wouldn’t be, by any chance, a laydee, but a fake Genuine Twanzwoman™ ?! Oh d’ horrors of horrors!

      yer twanzphobic.

      You probably don’t even realise the seriousness of a twanzbillionaire twanzsquirrel, getting recognition within squis place within the Oppression Olympics. Shame on you, you oppressor of twanzbillionaire twanzsquirrels!

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  2. whataboutthemen

    It seems like more people are realising just how transphobic we all are, by dint of our existence. Following Piers Morgan’s twitter feed was pretty funny.

    Maybe once earnest libfems twig to the fact that the magic asterisk after trans doesn’t do justice to how much transexuals hate transgenders and vice versa, it’ll help the learning process along. The asterisk is very transphobic.

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  3. Joe Halstead

    Thanks for the link to that HuffPost article. So many laughs, I couldn’t say where to begin. A tweet describing Leto’s role as being “in trans face” was classic.

    Like

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    1. DaveSquirrel Post author

      LOL, “transface” – dammit, why the hell didn’t I come up with that?!

      Is this the tweet? (follow the link to the thread)

      “i dont feel transface is any more appropriate than blackface.”

      Because, talk about totally missing the pink sparkly elephant in the living room! Blackface being offensive to POC, transface being super-offensive to TWs… but wait, did they not forget how offensive womanface is to women, or are we just invisible again? The obvious next step, is that females are offensive to TW, because transface! How dare we run around looking like women!

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      1. Joe Halstead

        No, it was a tweet by @kulandaybarrett that reads, “Jared Leto gets prestigious award & status for a role in transface, but trans women of color are struggling to stay alive. #transmisogyny”

        Also, yes, I agree, the irony is mind-boggling, they don’t mind imitating all sorts of things that they are NOT, but God forbid anyone imitate them. Your buddy, Jos Truitt weighed in on this, as well, I noticed ;)

        Like

  4. survivorthriver

    I think the Pharrell Williams song featured on the Oscars – Happy – is twanzphobic.

    The offensive lyrics just says “Happy” and doesn’t say cis-happy, trans-happy, FTM-happy, genderfluid-happy, gender non-conforming happy, gender questioning happy, gender variant happy, genderqueer happy, intersex happy, MTF happy, nutrois happy, non-binary happy, “other” happy, pangender happy, Trans* happy, Transperson happy, transmasculine happy, transfeminine happy, OR, two-spirit happy.

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      1. DaveSquirrel Post author

        your original comment did not work, (the most oppressedest twanzsquirrel) fixed it for you – needs a new line (your comment had it following on after ‘try:’)

        ETA:
        It looks as if the other tweet is earlier by the timestamp of 9:02 am – 3 Mar 2014

        Moar ETA, coz I can:
        Tweet follows the usual format:
        ‘something bad happens to person, but twanzwomen are murdered every minute of every day, thus, twanzwomen win the Oppression Olympics’

        Like

  5. Pingback: Transface, ironyface | twanzphobic since forever

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